My father

Most of us have at one point contemplated on death and what happens once we die. How will I die? Where will my remains be buried? Will I go to Heaven? Or be reincarnated? If so, as what?

My father has often talked about such questions since I was little. He believes that living is, in a way, a long preparation for death. I think he has a point. Now in his early 70s, my father has taken care not only to arrange for his own burial site, but those of his family and descendents across several generations. In fact, he has built a family cemetery. 

My father bought a fairly large parcel of land to build a family tomb. It's an indoor vault where the cremated remains of the deceased‐‐over 200‐‐will be stored. This is the largest private tomb in Jeju. Dad took my husband and me to see the vault. Outside the vault, my father lays out fruits and wine for a simple ancestral rite.

 

It was a hot day, but inside the vault it was much cooler, perhaps as it is inside a pyramid. The vault is made of marble and allows for ventilation and sunlight.

Inside the vault there are over 200 drawers. Each is designated for a particular family member, from my father's ancestors to posterity. On the front surface of each drawer is attached an individual tablet.

This family cemetery is for the males of the Yang family and their wives. Women who marry are considered no longer a Yang but a member of their husband's family. Therefore, I am a "Lee" instead of a "Yang," and am not eligible to be buried here. 

However, my dad said if I wished to be buried here‐‐with my husband's consent‐‐that I would take drawer number 51 and my hubby number 52.

Visiting the family cemetery my father has built, I come to think that it would be nice to be buried in Korea, the country of my birth and upbringing. If my husband and I were buried here, that would give our son, Russell, who was born in the U.S. and will likely live in the U.S., an extra incentive to visit Korea‐‐I hope.Korea is overpopulated for its territorial size; hence, burial land is in short supply. By law, most public cemeteries‐‐where the majority of Koreans are buried‐‐can keep the remains for only 50 years. Thereafter, it is up to the descendents to transfer the remains to another private site. 

Otherwise, they are moved and destroyed. My dad built a permanent family cemetery in consideration of these realities on land that by law cannot be converted into something else. So as long as the Korean state exists, so will this family cemetery. Our descendents will be able to participate together in ancestral rites at this site.  Ancestral rites are essential to the Confucian civilization and my family, including my two brothers, are strict adherents to this practice.

My husband visited this family cemetery more as a tourist, but is quite moved by the surroundings and is quick to help my dad set up the impromptu offerings to his ancestors. My dad also mentioned that he intends to build a playground off on a corner for children to play in.   

My dad has planted eucalyptuses by the entrance to the site. These flowers are not natie to Korea but were imported sometime in the 1980s by the then first lady. Eucalyptuses purportedly have antioxidant properties and represent the will to survive. They adorn this private land quite nicely.

Returning home we picked up my mother and went to a popular naengmyun (buckwheat noodles in cold beef broth) restaurant. Naengmyun is a favorite food in Korea, especially in hot weather. This is the oldest naengmyun restaurant in Jeju. Slurping in the cold noodles, it occurs to me that noodles are a traditional symbol of longevity. 

My Roots

My roots

My last name, Yang, is a Korean family name that's native to Jeju. According to the founding myth of the people of Jeju, three gods, respectively named Yang, Ko, and Bu, arose from the ground and founded the island kingdom of Jeju. These three last names are the most common last names in Jeju. In fact, all Koreans named Yang can trace their genealogical roots to Jeju.

One can visit the mythical grounds bearing three large holes from which these three progenitors of the people of Jeju purportedly arose, called Sam Seong Hyeol. Each year the governor of Jeju leads an ancestral rites ceremony on these grounds, which is a major celebration for the entire residents of the island. My father is a former head of the association of the Yang clan and makes sure to attend this event each year. He led us on a tour of Sam Seong Hyeol.



                          (The courtyard where the ancestral rites to the three progenitors are performed)

Jeju Dongmun Traditional Market

Dongmun Market in mid-June. Stopped by several times on visiting my parents.The most famous open market in Jeju Island, and perhaps all of Korea, Jeju Dongmun Market boasts some of the freshest local foodstuffs, from prized native Jeju seafoods like red tilefish, abalone, and hairtail fish to black pork, tangerines, and dried Mt. Halla black mushrooms, to clothing, shoes, and all kinds of gadgets and souvenirs. This sprawling market opened in 1945 in the aftermath of Korea's liberation from Japanese colonial rule. It was the island's center for everyday shopping until large-scale corporate stores and mega-supermarket franchises like E-Mart opened a decade ago. 

Still, many residents remain loyal to the vendors they've known for years and insist on shopping for all their needs at the Dongmun Market. My mother is one of them. My parents live literally within a stone's throw of the market and my mother shops there everyday for the freshest produce, seafood and meat. When I was in grade school I fell in love with Dongmun's ddeok bokki (spicy stir-fried rice cakes). The combination of the chewy rice cake, explosive fermented chili sauce, sugar, and spices is unforgettable. I always return to my favorite stall whenever I visit Jeju. Still the same yummy goodness after all these years!

(The famed Jeju hairtail fish)

It's glistening silver hue is simply dazzling. Never have I seen such fresh hairtail fish anywhere else in the world. I just love the taste of hairtail fish (think of a mix between sardine and snapper) and am always eager to get my hands on the fish when it's fresh. The big Korean supermarket nearby carries it frequently. But compared to what I am used to in Jeju, it's all invariably blueish and limpid. I would tell my husband about the super-fresh kind readily available in Jeju, and he, having never seen it with his own eyes, would say, "This looks pretty fresh to me." Well, never again! He was simply amazed by the freshness of the Jeju variety and exclaimed that henceforth we can never be satisfied with what's on the market back in the US!

                                                                    (Red Tilefish of Jeju)

Also known as red horsehead in Europe (the head of the fish resembles that of a horse), it's a type of sea bream or sea bass. Also known as Japanese tilefish, the glistening scales on the fish are reminiscent of shiny new reddish tile. The fish is usually sold dried. It retains its unique flavors when it's dried. The deep flavors of this delicacy are hard to describe. They remind me of Stilton cheese and black mushroom tempered by the freshest kind of cod. And they are not inexpensive! While red tilefish from China sell for about $10 per fish, the Jeju variety sells for $70! Connoisseurs claim that the native Jeju fish has incomparably deeper flavors. To all fish-lovers, I would highly recommend you try it on your next visit to Jeju.

                        Recordings of Korean "trot" music, much loved by middle-aged Koreans

                         Steamed whole pig head, Korean blood sausage, and pig's feet on display

Fresh live sea cucumber at Dongmun Market. One of my our favorite seafoods. My husband and I just love to eat it raw, sashimi-style. We were able to take care of our craving on this trip. On can find the freshest live abalone at several stalls in the market. Live, raw abalone is one of my favorite foods in the whole world. With each chewy bite you can taste the briny wholesome goodness of the sea.

Takoyaki Party

 
  

Takoyaki  (Japanese for "fried octopus ball," made of wheat flour batter and diced octopus, pickled ginger etc. and special sauce) is the quintessential street food in Japan. It is also very popular in Korea. Takoyaki is a simple, yummy snack or meal that is loved by men and women, young and old, somewhat like French fries or pizza in the US. 

When my husband's old friend from Japan, Tetsuro, visited us in early April, we went to a local Japanese grocery store and bought the ingredients for takoyaki and the special takoyaki pan upon Tetsuro's recommendation. The takoyaki pan is essential, as the small concave half-spherical molds in the iron pan give the takoyaki look. I chose the ready-to-use takoyaki batter mix as I am a novice. Tetsuro advised that one could simply use regular wheat flour with salt, pepper, and bits of seafood in the absence of proper taokoyaki mix. In fact, I found the takoyaki mix very salty, something to keep in mind for next time.

Ingredients: Takoyaki mix 110 grams; water 200 ml; eggs 50 grams; blanched octopus 50 grams; green cabbage 40 grams; spring onion 30 grams; cooking oil 15 grams; katsuobushi [dried fermented smoked tuna flakes] 5 grams; takoyaki sauce 45 grams, mayonnaise 45 grams.

1. Mix one whipped egg into water and add takoyaki mix. Stir well.

2. Dice the cabbage, spring onion, and the blanched octopus. 

3. Preheat the takoyaki pan on stove-top and coat it with cooking oil. Add egg/water/takoyaki mix to half-point of each mold in the pan. Add the diced cabbage, spring opnion, and octopus.

4. Add the remaining batter mix to fill each mold to the top and cook on medium heat.

5. As the batter puffs up and spills over, roll each takoyaki gently left and right in the mold so that it does not stick to the base of the mold.  

6. When the takoyaki turns brown (about 10 min), it is ready to be served. Remove the takoyaki from the pan and transfer them on to a plate; sprinkle generously the katsuobushi and pour the takoyaki sauce over the takoyaki and serve.

Ddeok Bokki (spicy Korean rice cake)

In Korea, ddeok bokki, stir-fried rice cake with spicy chili sauce, is the quintessential street food. One can find street vendors selling this favorite snack in busy intersections and city streets, campus towns, crowded open markets, as well as sleepy towns.

My friends Boyeon and Giyeon made this fiery version with chicken. The hot chili sauce burned my tongue delightfully. It was deliciously painful to eat, and utterly addictive.

Balsamic Vinegar

One fine spring day close to Easter. Flowers are blossoming and sweaters are finally being shed in New England. Russell sits contentedly in his stroller as I take him out for a walk in the sun. 

Back home, my husband and I opened an artisanal bottle of balsamic vinegar at lunch. We love fine balsamic vinegar and enjoy sipping it in a sherry glass. Our favorite of the month is Villa Manodori, which, according to the bottle label, is "produced in very small quantities by Massimo Bottura, chef and owner of Osteria Francescana restaurant in Modena....It is matured for 10 to 20+ years in small barrels of oak, chestnut and juniper woods, yielding a balsamic of dark rich color, intense aroma and syrupy consistency."

Syrupy it certainly is, as it grudgingly pours out of the bottle and into the sherry glass. It leaves a thick film on one the side of the glass as we tickle our tongue with its sinewy sweet drop. What a perfect pair to a sizzling thick cut of ribeye or pork chop. Stands up well to oily fish like salmon and mackerel, too. Does wonders to a humble plate of fresh mozzarella and vine-ripened tomatoes. But, it is best when tasted in small sips by itself. The complex flavors of wood and fruit just burst in your mouth. I see my husband stick his finger into the empty glass and smear his finger with the residue. "I've never sucked my fingers before," he intones, as he sucks on his index finger like our baby son.

Fish to die for

Spring is in the air, and that means flower blossoms on campus and fresh sea bream at the local fish market.
Over the weekend my husband's old friend from Japan, Tetsuro, visited. We walked through the lovely Tufts University campus and saw several kinds of flowers. 

The three of us, seafood-lovers that we are, stopped by what is by many accounts the best seafood market in Boston. Almost every item sold is sushi-grade, just gleaming with sweet, deep-sea freshness. Taut-looking black sea bream, gorgeous crimson-colored yellow tuna, stately red-orange-colored wild king salmon, shiny swordfish steaks, shad roe and giant shrimp that looked so full and tight that a pinprick could release all the juice, practically live-looking fluke, the freshest Wellfleet oysters, and my favorite, sea scallops that are so fresh and sweet they, when eaten raw, melt like butter on the tongue and permeate your entire mouth with sweet umami, all stared at me intensely. They don't come cheap, but the selections here are to die for. 

Tetsuro was a devoted customer when he was a student in Boston in the late-1990s, and we owe him a nice chunk of toro (fatty tuna) for introducing this place to us. No longer Boston's best kept secret, New Deal Fish Market draws customers from all over Boston who on weekends stand in line happily for 30 minutes or more. A very famous Japanese pitcher for the Boston Red Sox is among the regulars here. Highly recommended.

Fluke, sea scallops, and salmon sashimi. All were simply excellent--so flavorful and sweet.

The salmon skin and the layer of fat underneath was explosive on the palate. It was on the house, which was a nice gesture.

I've a feeling we'll be back at New Deal very soon. Thank you, Tetsuro!

King Crab Date

My husband and I ate a whole fresh king crab and a giant clam (mirugai) sashimi--among other seafood offerings--in Chinatown. That was a night to remember. One day my husband said stoically that he paid interest on his credit card charge for years afterwards! Well, it was worth it. So fresh and succulent was the crab meat, while the liver titillate the entire palate. And the giant clam's briny sweet taste and chewy texture were a pure delight! 

Baby Meals

My 15 month-old Russell is now enjoying solid foods. I've prepared porridge made of carrots, zucchini, seaweed, beef tenderloin and rice. Russell appreciated its soft texture. I keep seasoning to a bare minimum so as to accentuate the original flavor of each ingredient and avoid sodium. I've added just a few drops of sesame oil.




Russell always devours the foods I've made for him. I feel so happy when he enjoys all that I feed him!

My husband's creations

My husband also enjoys cooking, although he tends to do more eating than cooking. Once in a blue moon, he'll make some delectable dishes, just based on "instinct," without referring to recipes. He has highly developed taste buds--claims he can tell apart different brands of spring water in a blind taste! He certainly loves to eat and, I must admit, his creations are quite impressive.

Shrimp cocktail with fennel salad

Braised lamb shanks (seasoned with tomatoes, wine, anchovies, rosemary, caramelized onions)

Lamb shanks plated with mashed potatoes and carrots

Paella with seafood 

Prime-aged rib roast

Russell's first birthday

My son, Russell, turned one on January 28, 2012. My husband and I threw a traditional Korean first-birthday party for him the week before. It happened to be the snowiest day of this winter, but many friends came bearing good wishes and wonderful gifts.

Traditional Korean first-birthday table. Birthday boy in traditional costume for the occasion. Korean rice cakes symbolizing health, happiness, and character adorn the table. To Russell's right are various objects symbolizing his future career choice. Which will he pick among them: water celery (character and perseverance), stethoscope (self-explanatory), book, brush and ink, rice (wealth), cotton thread (longevity), toy bow and arrow, etc.? Well, Russell first touched the stethoscope with his left hand, then shifted his weight to the left and picked up the water celery with his right hand! So he will grow up to be a man of integrity, character, and strength--or perhaps an herbal doctor with such characteristics!

Happy Birthday Russell!!!